Ninety-Eight. Summer Dog.

June 30, 2011 § Leave a comment

On Day Ninety-Eight, Patrick and I attended a Braves game. Earlier in the season (when I had my face airbrushed actually) I saw someone eating a hot dog that looked pretty tasty. It had diced tomatoes and a thousand island type dressing covering the all beef meat on a bun. Since I had already had latex paint sprayed all over my face, and eaten dinner, I filed the image of the Summer Dog away as something new to try, later in the season. And that later came up on Day Ninety-Eight.

Patrick and I wandered up to the hot dog stand in the courtyard area of the Ted. Patrick ordered a Georgia Dog with vidalia onions and coleslaw. I got the Summer Dog. The monstrosity that came out was absolutely covered in some strange liquid that looked like thousand island dressing or even McDonald’s secret Big Mac sauce. I didn’t know which I would have preferred. It was actually a kind of combination of the two, with some spiciness that my sensitive palate didn’t care for. The sauce was overflowing off of the bun. I ate the meal, the entire thing, but like the Big Mac earlier this year, I don’t think I will revisit the Summer Dog anytime soon.

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Ninety-Seven. No Woof.

June 29, 2011 § 1 Comment

Murphy barks. He doesn’t bark all the time, but when he gets riled up, his sound is piercing and loud. He barks at dogs and people walking by the house, squirrels running through the backyard, and most annoyingly at us when our hands reach higher than our heads. You can’t raise your arms or stretch and you definitely cannot cheer for a sporting event on TV without him going on the attack. It’s the strangest thing, and I have no idea where this came from. We were tired of having to silently cheer when the Falcons scored a touchdown or Brian McCann hit a homerun to win the game. So I did something about it. On Day Ninety-Six, I tried out the Spray Sense Anti Dog Barking Collar on Murphy.

Before you get all up in arms about it, know that our vet recommended the product and it is a humane method to retrain your dog not to bark in certain situations. The box on the collar sits against the pup’s neck and when the vibrations of a bark are sensed through the device, a burst of citronella emits from it, interrupting pooch. They can see, smell, and hear the spray and they stop barking. With Murph, it really did work right away. He barked and then stopped immediately, then looked confusingly around to find the source of his agitator. By the end of the evening, he was so quiet that I felt bad for him. But the silence was quiet nice.

We take the collar off when he goes outside, in his crate, or to sleep at night. Mostly we just use it to train him not to bark at us, inside. And after a couple weeks, he should be good to go. Smart dog, that one.

Ninety-Six. Juice, Part Two.

June 28, 2011 § Leave a comment

I woke up bright and early on Day Ninety-Six, even before my alarm was set to go off at 530. That never happens. I repeated the process of preparing water bottles filled with the remaining gallon of the juice cleanse I began in Day Ninety-Five and headed to work for my second day of eating nothing.

The fast proved much easier on day two. My hunger had mostly subsided and I found myself drinking all of the juice much more quickly. I had more energy as well. I even considered going back to Arden’s Garden for a third gallon to keep up the cleanse. I didn’t follow through with that idea.

I finished the juice allocation by the middle of the afternoon and continued with several bottles of water until my hunger returned. I couldn’t wait until the following day to actually consume solid food again, so as a treat I planned to meet Patrick for a dinner of sushi. It was raw, right? I know sushi doesn’t actually fall into the typical raw food eating category, but it was better than going all out and grabbing the burger I had been craving for the past 72 hours. I didn’t eat much at dinner before I felt full, and my energy levels were still pretty high, so maybe it wasn’t exactly cheating. I mean, I did finish all the juice beforehand.

I never achieved that high energy refreshed, cleansed feeling I had read about during a fast. My clothes didn’t feel looser, and my skin wasn’t glowing like the propaganda proclaimed. However, I can see the appeal of wanting to detox in general, though for me the memories of junk food and meat cravings might prevent me from attempting another round of fasting for awhile.

Ninety-Five. Juice, and that’s it (part one).

June 28, 2011 § 2 Comments

Day Ninety-Five began my two day juice cleanse. After the extreme hunger and headache the day before, I wasn’t really looking forward to drinking a gallon of the orange-lemon-grapefruit mix from Arden’s Garden. But for the sake of trying something new (and flushing out toxins) I dutifully consumed the citrus juice.

I was working early that morning, and didn’t feel like carting a gallon jug with me into the building. So instead, I filled three water bottles with enough juice to last me my shift. Because clearly carrying three large water bottles filled with what looks like watered down OJ is much better than hauling in a gallon container of the same liquid. I drank one bottle on the way to work and refilled the cup with water. The fast said that I could drink as much reverse osmosis water as I wanted, but not knowing what reverse osmosissing entailed, I just opted for the spring h2o at the office.

I kept a little journal of how I was feeling throughout the day, and I think that can best describe the experience.

730    One bottle down. This isn’t so bad.

900    So hungry, and someone’s Chick Fil A breakfast sitting in the break room does little to alleviate the ache in my belly.

1000  Still hungry. I think this juice is eating away at my teeth. A strange combination of citrus and natural sugars. Maybe I should drink more water.

1015   I can’t stop thinking about Farm Burger. Again. I am going to get roasted garlic and gouda and bacon and tomato and paprika mayo and…you get the idea.

1130  I’m starving. Maybe today’s new activity can be to break a juice fast. My stomach is rumbling louder than the show host. And that’s saying a lot.

100   Only two more hours left until I can head home and nap. No headache, just an insatiable hunger. Insatiable because I can’t eat anything.

400  Home. Naptime.

700  Awake. I feel fine, not hungry. Still have a little bit of juice left.

900  Back to bed. Feeling good actually. Not hungry, and only a little tired.

And then I went to sleep, only to repeat the process the following day. Stay tuned…

Ninety-Four. Raaawwwrr.

June 25, 2011 § 1 Comment

On Day Ninety-Three I stopped by Arden’s Garden to pick up a couple of gallons of their two day juice fast. I had planned on starting the cleanse on Day Ninety-Four, but the nice hippie behind the counter suggested I eat “raw” the days before and after the fast. So instead of drinking only a gallon of juice as something new, I tried the raw diet in preparation, eating only uncooked food

I packed an array of raw food to take to work with me. Spinach salad (dressing was allowed), fruit salad, carrots, a banana, and raw almonds rounded out my packed snacks. And I was doing very well until about five hours into my shift when I developed a monstrous headache. I wondered if it was the fact that I hadn’t eaten anything cooked, or just a random coincidence. I started to think more of the former once I had eaten all of my snacks and started craving every food that popped into my mind. I finished the El Mexicano post and wanted a cimichanga. I got into a discussion about burgers joints in the area and fantasized about what I would add to my own patty next time I went to Farm Burger. I thought about Morelli’s ice cream and mentally scoured the refrigerator for something that would break my raw diet as soon as I got home. If this is what eating raw is like, what would tomorrow bring?

I made it through the day with only one cheat (I didn’t know that hummus was cooked until I had consumed half the container and checked online). I went to bed early (and hungry), and I seriously pitied those who would have to work with me the next day if the hunger headache continued. I am not a happy camper when starved.

But on a positive note, I had a bunch of fruit and veggie waste for the compost!

Ninety-Three. Card Carrying Member.

June 24, 2011 § 3 Comments

Growing up, I loved going to the library. I would check out near the maximum amount of material and be back a couple days later to re-up. In college I used the GSU library mostly for research in some subjects, and occasionally for naps between classes. But most of my reading was relegated to the purchased textbooks of each course. And I think having to buy all of those books for college created a book collector out of me. Now I have them color coordinated on my shelves and stored in boxes at my parents’ house. On Day Ninety-Two, I took a step in the more affordable direction; I joined the public library, on my own, without being a student or having my mom’s name on the card next to mine.

I walked into the East Atlanta branch of the Atlanta Public Library ready with my application pre-printed and filled out. I waited for a patron to check out a slew of DVDs (you can check out movies?!?), and a few minutes later was browsing the books, new library card in hand.

Walking around made me realize how I had forgotten the Dewey Decimal system of categorizing. I wasn’t looking for anything in particular, just browsing the spines, opening a book to be hit with that very particular library book smell that brought me back to my childhood. While I was wallowing in nostalgia, the front desk clerk announced that the branch would be closing soon. I grabbed a mystery novel set in London 1905 (I like Edwardian) and made my way out. If it’s good, maybe I’ll buy it.

It wasn’t all that good.

Ninety-Two. Murph gets shorn.

June 23, 2011 § Leave a comment

Murphy was hot. He needed a haircut, so I figured I would buy an inexpensive pet grooming kit and buzz him myself. Yeah, well, inexpensive and pet grooming do not go together. Even if the manager at Petco offered to take 25% off the $80 price tag of the “awesome” pet clippers. So on Day Ninety-One I bought a pair of human hair clippers and trimmed the pup.

Before

Last year mid summer I decided that Murphy was too hot and needed a haircut so I took to him with a blunt pair of shears. It was horribly uneven and for days I would cut off stray pieces of long hair as he sat in my lap. Then last winter I went to trim his beard and he turned his head at the precise moment I closed the handles of the cutters to leave him looking like the Joker from the right side. So at-home grooming by Laura could be a kind of toss up for Murphy’s vanity. Fortunately he is very down-to-earth regarding his appearance.

I enlisted Patrick as a “dog handler” which basically meant that his job was to prevent the pooch from leaping off the table. And Murphy did well as I sheared the back half of his body. He sat still, was calm, and never tried to leap away. However, when it came time to trim the growing mats on the back of his neck and anywhere around his head, he squirmed. I had visions of “Joker Dog” flashing through my mind.

After

In the end, he doesn’t look as good as he would if groomed, but also not nearly as bad as my past shearing results. And I’m sure he feels a lot better.

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