That Annoying Sweater Issue (285th new thing).

February 12, 2012 § Leave a comment

My mom had one of those electric sweater defuzzers when I was a kid. I loved using it to erase the irritating balls of wool that had accumulated on my winter wear in  uncomfortable places. Underarms, elbows, wrists; the little nubbins were a sign that I put my elbows on the table and shuffled my shoulders too much. I’ve kind of been looking out for one, even if I’d heard that they are actually bad for your clothing. Picking the balls off by hand is one of those therapeutic, yet increasingly frustrating activities. You finish one armpit with satisfaction and suddenly realize you have another entire area to pull at as well. Talk about first world problems.

I hadn’t seen one of the electric versions of the defuzzer in the store, but a low-tech variation caught my eye in line at the check out. A sweater stone, used before the industrious defuzzer, apparently for centuries (if what you read on packaging is true). On Day Two Hundred Eighty-Five, with nothing else exciting going on and a closet full of fuzzed up sweaters, I decided to try out the pumice-like device.

It worked. Pretty well, actually. I scraped the stone the size of a bar of soap across my worst piled sweater and quickly had a handful of fiber. It was as gratifying as picking off the individual balls by hand (there is something pleasing in menial meticulous activities), but cut the time it took to defuzz a sweater in half.

I ended up getting through the de-fuzzation of four garments before I realized I had wasted half an hour of my time. As long as there are sweaters in my closet with tiny balls of down sprinkled over the fabric, I will keep sweater stoning the crap out of them.


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